When you read any article online
whether be about tips on how to be happier,
or habits of highly successful people.
One recurring thing you’ll see is,
stop comparing yourself to other people.
Kinda obvious in a sense,
but at times,
it can be a lot easier said than done.
Well for me at least,
But I’m willing to guess at times, it can be the same for you.
So rather just pretending you don’t care what other people are doing,
its far more effective to just manage how you do it.
In particular, how you actually compare yourself to whoever it is.
Usually it’s a friend or a relative.
But before you start focusing in on that one area of his life,
where he seems to be doing so well.
Take a step back and have a look at his whole situation.
So if you’ve a mate who’s making loads of money,
and at times it can make you jealous or envious.
what’s his relationship like with his family?
Does he spend all day in work?
Is he constantly stressed to his eyeballs?
Is he getting fatter every time you see him coz he’s not time to exercise?
Does he have to sedate with booze every weekend?
Or likewise if you have a mate who’s in really good shape:
What’s his social life like?
Does he spend all his free time in the gym?
Does he see his wife or kids?
What does he do for fun?
Would you like that lifestyle?
See what I’m getting at?
Most people only really talk about their highlights,
the good things they have going on.
And it can be easy for us to compare that aspect of their life to ours.
It comes down to the saying:
“don’t compare other peoples highlights with your behind the scenes”
It’s why that facebook newsfeed can be so dangerous.
Constantly being bombarded with peoples highlights.
If you have a mate that has it all going for him,
then pay attention to him, because success leaves clues.
But if he’s a rich bloke, who’s missus hates his guts,
kids never see him, and has a belly of doom,
then I wouldn’t be too quick to obsess about all that money
he claims to be making.
So when you make a comparison, be as fussy as possible.
look at their whole picture, when you do
chances are you wouldn’t swap your situation with his.
Andrew “behind the scenes“ Lahart